More Suggestions for Keeping Pesach Interesting

1) ASK QUESTIONS. The Haggadah has it right, but the story of Yetziat Mitzrayim will only get you so far. People, on the other hand, never cease to intrigue, especially older people, and random questions to relatives about their pasts (bungalow colonies, Satmar sleepaway camp, Poland, sheitels, dating, you name it) has given me some of the richest, most delicious info. Don’t pass on these opportunities to hear people’s stories, everyone loves sharing them and there will inevitably be a time when you’ll wish you knew more but you’ll no longer have the opportunity to ask. Ask.

2) DON’T FIGHT, EVER. This may not be applicable to some people reading, but I will confess that there was once a time when I thought conversations with anyone were most interesting when we located a point of disagreement. I am DIFFERENT from my family in this way, I DISAGREE with you in this respect— I, I, I. The truth is, everyone comes from different places, and points of disagreement are almost always, I would even say always, predicated upon vastly different sets of circumstances that led each party in those different directions. Choosing any single issue on which to disagree is arbitrary, understanding the world of thoughts and experiences that led that that person to think the way she does is fascinating. Also, I know what I think, what fun is it to vociferously assert it when I could be getting insight into someone else’s weird, complex world. And really changing someone else's outlook is hard, perhaps one of the hardest things one can do, better to just sit back and analyze the various ways people approach things.

3) Take advantage of the attention of people who care about you. There are very few situations in life where the people around you are truly, genuinely, concerned about your best interests. Family gatherings are one of them, and yet, they are usually too annoying for us (or at least me) to be able to appreciate that fact. But take advantage of what you can, ask your relatives for advice in whatever interpersonal affair has been concerning you as of late-boys, friends, colleagues, teachers whatever. Their advice may not be extraordinarily helpful, but I think it is always so fun to hear people’s take on you and your life, and they will feel so flattered for being consulted, and you never know what new aspect of the situation will be illuminated.

4) Play with kids. This is definitely not applicable to everyone, but certain people, inhabiting certain urban, collegiate, everyone is above age 20 worlds, sometimes forget how amazing the process of early cognition can be. When learning is not this tedious re-processing of the same overprocessed jargon but a really exciting journey of discovery and making connections, where there really is new stuff to know, and wildly appealing things to do. Also if you can convince them to give you the chills…perfection! I still think I like spending time with adults more, but kids are absolutely, positively indispensable, and I can’t wait to have like 15 of my own.

Ok, I think that was the preachiest thing I’ve ever written, but I really mean this advice, it’s come from the very depths of my (albeit limited) experience. Of course I imagine some people were just BORN knowing this stuff, and look forward to every family holiday with mature and even-tempered pleasure. And for them I will be happy to insert some angst and provocation next time around. But for now, I hope everyone really enjoys their holidays, and makes the most of a point in time that can never be returned to.